The word universe means “to turn into one.”
It’s been a while since I have posted and I have yet to post a personal,
stream of consciousness piece here…..so….yeah.
I continue to find it impossible to live and write simultaneously.
As my story unfolds, it feels all too vulnerable/foolhardy/impatient to turn
the pertinent and intimate events of my life over to words while
anticipating every pending revelation of tomorrow’s unknowns.
Hindsight. Reflection. Time.
These retrospectives give Space for understanding, insight, and the
utilities of concept, metaphor, and development that form a cohesive
and interesting report on an otherwise tangled mess of a personal journey.
That doesn’t mean that I don’t write. Or scribble. Or scratch. Or doodle.
Or muse. Or repeat the same mundane paragraph that haunts every journal;
a pep talk, usually, about how no matter how great or awful __(life)___ might
feel in that moment, change is inevitable. The pages of my notebooks are salted and
peppered with hopeful, “You can do it, buddy’s,” half-hearted “Fuck this shit’s,”
lists of good intent, and lots of bad ideas.
Often on the same page.
And eventually the unknowns become known.
The story progresses, the chapters begin and end in harmony with the seasons, or weeks,
or months, or years…whichever arbitrary system we use to mark these inevitable changes.
And along with the physical, visceral, ethereal, real, and imagined transformations,
when change is ACKNOWLEDGED it is ultimately a reflection of our own growth and
increased understanding through the personal journey.
That’s what makes the present so elusive and boring.
Change is happening right now. And now. And now. And now. And now.
To attempt to capture the present is to lose it entirely.
That is, to convey any notion of present-ness – its eternal permanence and passing –
forces us to search for meaning and knowledge from the past, apply these
definitions to a “now” that is simultaneously expiring and yet to exist, relative to
predisposed predictions about the infinite possibilities of an unknowable future.
It is this Time and Space… or non-Time and non-Space… of the present moment
wherein lies the magic and the mystery. The infinite knowing that the present
is the only thing that *actually* exists and since you’re the only thing responsible
for your reality, it is your life’s work to be present with each moment
as they ebb and flow and zoom and wander through your being in a single breath times infinity.
This is the power of Being.
Of unconditional Love.
Of Accepting that every thing is temporary.
Of Gratitude for what has been, what is, and will be.
The present moment is a chance to shape your future as it gives way to
past knowledge and intentions.
It’s how dreams become reality and where your magic is no longer a surprise visitor.
It’s an opportunity to create and cultivate a life worthy of you living it.
Right here-right here.
Right now-right now.
“Letting go is like…..the hardest thing ever….until you let go. Then you realize that hanging on was the hardest thing ever and really, it was the transition that you feared most.” – yours truly
From sleep to awake
Vacation back to work
Cradle to Grave
All discomfort and not knowing and newness and unfamiliar stuff happening.
Change is inevitable.
We invented time to measure change.
Change is more real than time.
With each breath, each passing day, change is ever upon us; on the horizon, down the street, in front of your eyes and you are it. Because you change. All day everyday. Change comes from within. Change your mind. Change your perspective. Change your definition of success. Change your furniture. Change the song that’s playing. Even that millisecond of silence between songs offers endless possibilities : a shitty song comes on, a great song comes on, battery dies – no music, app closes unexpectedly….and that’s just in the silence between songs.
Let go of your expectation for change to be predictable.
It is the essence of change – of transition – that forces us into Faith, Trust, Hope, and Acceptance of what has been, what is, and what is yet to be.
as i peruse my old journals and doodles and notes and jots, time and time again i see how i knew all the answers before they became apparent to my consciousness. muddling through the details, sweating the small stuff, wondering how ever in the world was i going make it through….
looking over old texts, clearing out emails and messages, i also see tons of answers to my own questions…making me further realize that all that i need i already have within me. sometimes i just have to take my own advice.
do you look over your old journals and notes? what do you see throughout the years? do you find this kind of information useful?
if you see patterns of negativity in your personal paper trail, you can change your present course by saying (or yelling) “ok, self…listen up!! we’re gonna change a few things around here, but it’s for the better – so your cooperation at this time is greatly appreciated!!!”
if you mess up, forgive yourself and move on. each moment is a new opportunity. if you hit a wall, change your definition of success. make your goal something you can easily accomplish in a day.
somewhere, buried in all of us, are the all the answers we’ll ever need…since we’re the ones who make the questions in the first place.
on the path of becoming more myself, i have encountered a number
of detours along the way. diverging from my track to explore other
territories, derailed by doubt and fear, coaxed from the trail by
curiosity, boredom, misguided hope, laziness….
i often stray from the spiritual path…and am quickly reminded
of how much more difficult Life is when i try to be something i’m not.
when i follow in another’s footsteps, i lose sight of my own.
where i’ve been, where i am and where i’m going all gets lost
in somebody else’s idea of being. all of a sudden, i look up and
i’ve wandered so far from my own path that i can’t even see
what set me off track in the first place.
that’s when i realize that it’s all part of the journey.
the detours and divergent paths of distraction are
opportunities to practice what i’ve learned
and more importantly:
to learn what needs more practice.
it is this crucial lesson that is to be
brought forth by such wanderings…
to become illuminated by imperfection.
basking in my own humanity i am reminded of my path;
of my own, personal journey to perfection
of becoming the perfect me
…which i already am.
Lotsa folks these days are saying,
“I’m not so much religious, I’m spiritual.”
Well that’s fine and dandy, but I find that I’m
very religious and quite spiritual.
Rites, rituals, celebrations, formalities, ceremony…
all of this facilitates the spiritual experience.
Otherwise, how would we know when the Spirit of God was falling or not?
Can we even tear the two apart?
Can we be religious without being spiritual
or spiritual without being religious?
Right now the practical isn’t working, so I’m resorting to magic.
It’s not always – or even often – the case, but I’ve done the research and it seems that it’s time for magic right now. Throw all your rules and rulers out the window because magic doesn’t care about guidelines or gurus. Magic cares about you, it cares about here and it cares about now. That’s about it. Everything else is beyond the realm of YOUR magic’s reach. Because magic comes from within.
The timing is wrong, the results are not yielding in the familiar ways. What happens when the practical is the only magic you know? “Effectiveness is the measure of truth” and “There’s always another way to do anything” come to mind.
It’s time to let go, to go with the flow, to love unconditionally, to believe in your dreams, to imagine new heights, to ask for the impossible; it’s time to level the fuck up.
And so far it’s working.
It works better than stressing.
It works better than guessing.
Magic works the way only it knows how.
Fueled by Faith and Encouraged by Hope, Magic happens when there’s Love.
Not sure how long this window will last, when it will be time to return to the practical – maybe tomorrow, maybe never. All I know is that I’m yielding better results -right now- without trying so damn hard.
Here’s an easy-to-read-and-understand guide to the moon’s phases.
It might help explain what’s happening and why;
and give you a better idea of how to make the most of the
inevitable changes brought about by Moon.
Imagine being in a tribe of about 25 or so people on the night of a New Moon.
Huddled around the fire all is well, but beyond y’all is Infinite Darkness of Nothingness.
The landscape is invisible and full of every possibility that only The Void can bring.
Enveloped in the Black Womb of Creation and Destruction you know Fear and Hope
it is the Beginning and End of All Things.
….Before God said, “Let there be Light,” there was first
the Deep Dark Nothingness from which Light and Life spring forth.
Now imagine a couple weeks later when the Full Moon
lights up your whole world and everything that was once hidden
around you is illuminated and nothing is unseen or unknown.
It is as if the Sun is out at night and you can run, jump and play
through the night without doubt or fear…there’s an obvious correlation here.
Moon controls the very tide, it is by the Moon that we plant and harvest.
By the Sun we are given Light and our ever-changing Night Light….
Yet Moon reminds us of the Feminine in Her Constant Change, guiding
the Ebb and Flow of Humanity…Moon reminds us of the Breath in Her Full Moon Inhale
and Her New Moon Exhale and each and every phase of the waxing and waning
process….Moon reminds us of Life in Her Brightest Moments and Darkest Hours.
It’s always been a dream of mine to go into space and to the moon.
Would you go to the Moon?
Do you have any Moon rituals?
Do you notice any personal patterns that go along with Moon’s phases?
Do you only think about the Moon once in a Blue Moon?
it’s tough to follow up on a post that outlines all the answers in life.
But like, if you can find any answer that doesn’t boil down to the breath of life and death, please enlighten me with your question. i’m extremely interested.
but beyond that. or within that…within the B-R-E-A-T-H we’ve got it all: be, eat, art, earth, heart, beat.
these are the PRACTICES of moving through our days and nights.
what makes us tick?
what grounding practices bring us closer to earth? …closer to self?
what satiates hunger?
what makes your heart beat faster?
what calms your racing heart?
what harmonizes the inevitable ebb and flow?
I suggest starting with the cliché as one’s jump-off. Tried and true cultural proverbs accelerate the learning curve when applied to the lesson. In this case:
“Practice makes perfect.”
Practicing the art of the breath. The art of food. The art of dance. The art of matters of the heart. The art of being a part of a community here on earth. The art of art – of creation and destruction…of inspiration and expiration. And still we are not beyond the breath…but knee deep in a practice of life and living.
My art is interacting with people. It’s magic. It’s more than magic. It’s inspiration plus practice.
Whether it be from behind the bar of your favorite substance, or in every day conversation, or in the throes of a ritual. These are the practices that take up my days and nights. They pay my bills. Feed my face. Make my heart skip a beat. Inspire me to keep doing what I do until I finally expire.
What are your practices? (Daily? Weekly? Monthly? Annual?)
If “power increases with sensory attention,” what do you do to increase the power in your practices? What practices do you do to which you give too much or not enough power?
KALA – Freedom : There are no limits
– Everything is Connected
– Separation is a Useful Illusion.
Let’s face it.
We’re all searching for a sign…not just any ol’ sign…
We want a Spontaneous Celestial Confirmation for anything and everything
from, “What do I wear today,” to “Will I make it through today?”
And we search for and find signs all day everyday to assure us and guide us along the path.
Let’s explore the nature of signs and discuss how to interpret these
mystical occurrences and maximize their effects in your life.
WHY DO WE SEEK SIGNS?
In direct relation to our uncertainty and our perceived value of the
outcome of our unknown, we arbitrarily connect events and call them signs or omens.
That means we see signs when we don’t know where to go or what to do and we apply increased
meaning to their occurrences depending on how much value we place on the outcome.
We carry trinkets and talismans.
We wear lucky underwear and jerseys.
When we’re hungry and thirsty we look for Golden Arches and Green Sirens.
We look for the exit signs to reach our destinations.
Signs let us know we’re on the right track.
Our ancestors knew signs intimately; as we sought signs of food and water;
we looked for animal tracks, broken branches, a shift in the way the wind blows.
A fresh hot steaming pile of poo suddenly changes the spirit of the hunt….
It’s a sign! Food is near.
WHAT IS A SIGN?
We’ll look at the first few definitions for the noun for now:
1 an object, quality, or event whose presence or occurrence indicates the probable presence or occurrence of something else:
• something regarded as an indication or evidence of what is happening or going to happen
• [ with negative ] used to indicate that someone or something is not present where they should be or are expected to be
• Medicine: an indication of a disease detectable by a medical practitioner even if not apparent to the patient
• a miracle regarded as evidence of supernatural power (chiefly in biblical and literary use)
• any trace of a wild animal, esp. its tracks or droppings: wolverine sign
ORIGIN Middle English: from Old French signe (noun), signer (verb), from Latin signum ‘mark, token.’ ”
Note that the first listed definition of sign has to do with
the PROBABLE presence or occurrence of something ELSE.
I cannot stress enough to you the power of STATISTICS when interpreting your signs.
It’s the connection from the known to the unknown that we seek and a sign is a symbolic representation of that connection. Don’t let desperation guide your vision. Open your heart and eyes to infinite possibilities, use everything as a sign always, and don’t be surprised to find that you’re already on the right path…
TYPES OF SIGNS:
Animals: Dogs, cats, insects, birds, beetles, squirrels, and even roadkill can be used as signs. Take a week or so to study the animal encounters in your life. Pay attention to their unique powers and how that power is reflected in your life.
Objects: Trinkets, charms, talismans, coins…any THING that MEANS anything to you in the moment that it matters.
Songs and lyrics from songs : From your playlist – less significant – or from a passing vehicle or radio -more significant, music and lyrics can appear in such a timely way it’s difficult to ignore. Looking for an answer? Tune into the nearest radio for a personal transmission.
Colors: Discover or develop and use a system of colors and their meanings that suits your paradigm. Check out a chakra chart or use THIS BASIC CHART or create your own!!! I use colors that correlate with the principles of my shamanism:
White – Awareness
Red – Freedom
Orange – Focus
Yellow – Persistence
Green – Love
Blue – Confidence
Violet – Flexibility
Symbols: seeing a sticker on a passing car, or a heart in your pancake syrup, or the face of Christ in your toast are all SYMBOLS. They mean nothing until you see it and apply your own meaning.
Stones, Shells, Bones, Feathers, or any evidence of another thing: These are symbols of a thing that was there and is no longer. Look up the meaning of the thing that is represented and follow the connections. Feathers mean you’re on the right path, shells indicate protection, bones are structure, etc….
Weather and Elemental Events: Meditate upon the elements and what they ARE and DO. Earth. Water. Wind. Fire. Each with its unique creative and destructive nature, observe the elements around you, tune into the frequency and hear the messages! Earth is unmoving, water flows, wind carries change, fire burns and brings life. Lightning illuminates. Rain cleanses. Thunder rumbles. Earthquakes shift.
Anything odd or out of place: Remember that statistics play a huge role in interpreting signs. Follow the weird connections. Trace them back and uncover what piqued your attention to that thing in the first place? Has your sign been there all along but only now you notice?
Any occurrence to which you apply meaning: It’s your interpretation. Your uncertainty, your life path, your decisions, your dreams, your manifestations, your work, your journey. You decide how to receive and utilize these bits and pieces of information.
HOW DO I KNOW IF MY SIGN IS MEANINGFUL AND HOW CAN I MAKE MY SIGNS MORE POWERFUL?
Sometimes we ask for a sign…
and wonder if each and every oddity is the omen we seek to move forward.
Sometimes we have a symbol in which we place our hope
and it appears in the moment we need it most.
The sign is as meaningful and powerful as you choose.
Power increases with sensory attention.
Can you see, hear, taste, touch, and smell your sign?
Take note. What senses can you use to interpret your sign?
Identify those symbols and their meanings.
What senses are missing?
Focus on the missing senses…Imagine what you can’t assess.
Can’t see the wind but you know it brings change?
Close your eyes and imagine what beautiful dreams are being delivered to you in the breeze.
Can’t touch the Eagle but you know it connects air and land and sea and stands for creation, swiftness,
dignity, and wisdom? Imagine yourself flying with Eagle as he guides you to new heights, ask Eagle
your question and imagine him providing the answer you seek.
Using the moment your sign appears to imagine a solution using the symbols available is the secret to uncovering hidden answers.
Since all the answers are already inside of you, creating a flexible symbol system helps you decipher your deeper wisdom.
HOW TO INTERPRET SIGNS:
1. Identify the uncertainty that brought you to recognize and apply meaning to your sign.
You wouldn’t see meaning if you didn’t seek it.
2. Approach your sign with the 6 questions: WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN, WHY, & HOW?
WHO are you in the moment your sign appears?
Gauge your needs, assess your countenance.
Are you really just hungry and looking for a sign for food?
Don’t even begin interpreting life’s cosmic coincidences until
you are breathing slowly, fed, watered, and secure.
WHAT is your sign?
What is it? Stumble on a lone Queen of Diamonds card stuck in a bush?
Look up the meaning of the card and the meaning of bush. Apply those meanings.
Animal? Look up your animal totem meaning.
Object? What does the object represent in general? To you? To your situation?
Number? What does your special number mean in general? What does it mean to you?
Star Stuffs has a great animal totem dictionary.
This lady has an extensive page of diverse symbology resources.
Keep a journal of signs for a week, lemme know what happens!
WHERE were you and WHERE was your sign when you saw it?
On the ground?
In a puddle?
On the concrete?
In the dirt?
Did you almost trip over it?
Did it fall into your lap?
Use the elements available to apply meaning.
All of these details increase the power of your sign.
WHEN did your sign appear to you?
Day? Night? In a dream? At work?
Were you asking for a sign?
Or did your sign evoke a hidden uncertainty?
A sign also tells you what’s ahead.
WHY do you seek a sign?
Why this sign? Why right now? Why is this here?
Why am I here? Why am I seeking an answer that
I already have within me?
HOW does your sign appear?
What color is it?
What shapes make up your sign?
What’s around it?
Who put it there?
How does it relate to your fear/doubt?
How do you feel upon encountering your sign?
3. Build a vocabulary for interpretation:
-Cross reference your set of symbols by looking up even minor encounters. Check for patterns.
-Read about geometric shapes and colors and their prescribed meanings. Start to see these symbols in everyday life and practice interpretation as a form of meditation of being present.
-Keep it simple: Birds fly, fish swim, cows herd…Do you need to fly and gain a different perspective? Need more water in your life? Need more or less community? Use the simple symbols and meanings first and allow the answers to surface from deep within you. The symbols help to communicate the inner knowledge of all things connected without the illusion of time and space and allows the human person to conjure information from the source of infinite light/life/breath/brilliance/stardust that is all things and nothing.
Once you begin to understand what your symbols mean, you can ask the Great Unknown for a sign
and within moments you will notice something that eases the uncertainty rather than grasping thin air for meaning…and then you’ll rest in the peace that everything is a sign that point to the fact that you exist and you are you and that’s what’s so special about all and none of us. Because Separation is a Useful Illusion….as in….Separation lets a stapler be a stapler and a kitty cat be a kitty cat. They’re both black and sit on your desk while you work, but without the illusion of separation you might as well be the pixel that ends this sentence. Symbols tell the tale, signs move the story along.
-Signs are everywhere all the time.
-What makes you notice them is your uncertainty and the relative value of the outcome.
-Fulfilling the fundamentals (air, water, food, shelter) makes you less desperate for a sign
and more keen to statistically unlikely connections, more open to different answers.
-Interpreting signs is a fun, easy, and useful practice for
easing uncertainty and choosing a course of action.
Signs are not answers. They are items, events, and occurrences to which
we apply meaning in accordance with our beliefs about what is probable and what is possible.
Signs may guide us, give us confidence, provide a glimmer of hope in a dark time,
but the most important task is the positive interpretation of sign occurrences and application of their unique and loving meanings that you derive. Maximize encounters by increasing knowledge of symbols, being present with timing and context, and paying attention to those statistically unlikely, seemingly unconnected glitches in the matrix.
The power is in the practice.
Truth lies in paradox.
Remember that you are already perfect and already doing it all perfectly.
If you need a sign to remind you of that, take a breath.
And another. And another. And another.
Breathing is a sign of life.